This page summary, takeaways, and transcript were generated
by AI from the video captions.
The video itself remains the source of truth.
Living abroad as a single expat offers unparalleled freedom and control over one's life, fostering personal growth, independence, and the ability to reinvent oneself.
The video explores the significant advantages of living abroad as a single expat, highlighting the profound sense of independence and control it offers. This lifestyle allows for complete autonomy in decision-making, from spontaneous travel plans to daily routines like choosing meals or activities. The host emphasizes that this granular control over one's life is a refreshing aspect, particularly for those seeking to escape the need to constantly consider another person's preferences or needs.
Beyond independence, the expat bachelor life is presented as a catalyst for personal growth. Without the contentment or distractions of a relationship, individuals can intensely focus on self-improvement, investments, health, and pursuing their own curiosities. This period allows for a dedicated pursuit of personal goals, whether it's fitness, education, or exploring new interests, all dictated by the individual's desires rather than shared compromises.
The discussion also touches upon the benefits of privacy and flexibility. Maintaining a higher degree of personal privacy is a significant perk, as is the ability to travel spontaneously and adjust plans on a whim without needing approval or considering a partner's schedule. This flexibility extends to self-care, budgeting, and even socializing, where single expats can more easily integrate into various social circles and manage their finances according to their own priorities. Ultimately, the expat bachelor lifestyle provides a unique opportunity to reinvent oneself and live life on one's own terms.
Expat bachelor life freedom means having complete autonomy over your decisions and lifestyle while living abroad as a single man. This independence allows for unmatched control over your daily activities, travel plans, and personal growth without needing to compromise with a partner.
As a single expat, you have full control over your schedule, finances, and personal pursuits. This means you can prioritize self-improvement, invest in your goals, and make spontaneous decisions about travel or social activities without needing to consult or consider anyone else's preferences.
Key benefits include enhanced independence, significant opportunities for personal growth, and greater privacy and flexibility. Single expats can also enjoy simplified budgeting and avoid potential relationship complexities, making it easier to focus on their own development and experiences.
Flexibility is crucial as it allows single expats to travel spontaneously, change plans on a whim, and manage their schedules without compromise. This adaptability extends to social life and personal routines, enabling a lifestyle that's entirely dictated by individual desires and opportunities.
Absolutely. The expat bachelor life provides ample time and focus for self-improvement, health, investments, and pursuing personal interests. Without the demands of a relationship, individuals can dedicate themselves to achieving personal goals and exploring new passions.
The video suggests that as a single expat, it's important to prioritize your own happiness and not compromise your desires for a partner. This means being able to say no to things that don't align with your plans, like traveling alone or with friends, and not jeopardizing your own well-being.
The video implies that the dating scene in the Philippines offers a wide array of choices, potentially alleviating loneliness. It suggests that initiating conversations with women is generally well-received, and it's common to exchange contact information. This abundance of options can lead to an embarrassment of choices rather than a lack of companionship.
While the video emphasizes the freedom and flexibility of single expat life, it doesn't directly address the concept of 'part-time relationships' or guarantee a lack of clinginess. The general sentiment suggests that maintaining independence is key, and potential partners should not compromise your personal freedom.
Being a single expat offers complete autonomy over your lifestyle and decisions, allowing for spontaneous travel and personal routines without needing to consult anyone. This independence fosters personal growth by providing the focus to invest in self-improvement, health, and personal interests.
The video suggests that loneliness is not a significant issue for single expats in the Philippines due to the abundance of social opportunities. It highlights that it's easy to initiate conversations and connect with people, leading to an abundance of choices rather than a lack of companionship.
0:02 Hey YouTube, Alex here. And in today's video, I want to answer the question: What are the benefits of living alone as an expat? I'm often getting this question about my bachelor lifestyle, and I think that might be coming to an end here pretty soon. I've encountered a lot of benefits of this. I've spent a lot of my time overseas as a bachelor dating, so without further ado, let's get into it.
0:25 The first point is independence. And when you're living as an expat bachelor, you can really decide everything about your life. You have a lot of control over lifestyle design. If you want to travel somewhere else for the weekend, if you want to travel to another country or another city, you don't have to ask anybody. If you want to spend a couple days at home and not really go out, not really do anything, you don't have to ask anybody. All of your decisions are on you.
0:53 And you can really have this granular control. What do you want to eat? Where do you want to go? What do you want to watch on TV? You have so much independence, and it's really refreshing. I think for some guys that maybe they're having recently gone through a breakup or divorce, they like this level of control. They like this level of freedom. They don't have to think about what another person might want to do or how another person might want to spend their time.
1:19 They have so much independence in terms of decision-making. And I think for some, it could be a little scary. But I think for a lot of guys, they like that. They like not having to think about, 'Okay, well, if I can't make it to work today, how is that going to affect my team?' or 'If I can't pick up the kids from school, how is that going to affect my significant other?'
1:39 As for me, I really like that I can come and go from my apartment at any time. I never have anyone asking me questions, 'Why are you going here? Why are you going there? Why did you spend time with that person? Why are you going to meet this person?' It doesn't matter what hour I leave my apartment. It doesn't matter what hour I come home. Whether I bring somebody with me or not, whether I'm going to meet someone or not.
2:01 I like to try different restaurants, and I found that a lot of Filipinos are not open to Western food. They'll try it, but they don't really like it. And I'm not the type to say, 'You will eat this or you will eat that.' They often prefer to have Filipino foods. This isn't a concern for me as a single guy. I can really just eat wherever I want, whatever I want, whatever hour I want. It makes no difference. I live to make myself happy and to satisfy myself at this point.
2:29 Now, there are some downsides which I'll talk about in a different video. But for now, let's focus on the benefits of living as a bachelor. The next point is personal growth. And I found that when I was younger and I was in relationships, I had this sense of contentment that caused me to stagnate in some ways. I was so happy with being in a relationship and not feeling lonely and getting attention that I kind of just spaced out when it came to advancing myself.
2:56 And in terms of education or improving my life in different ways, I just felt so content. I don't really see a point in trying to get ahead because I felt like I had it made. And so when you are in a happy relationship, for some of us, we can just kind of slow down, relax, not really feel like we need to get a whole lot done. We feel like we made it.
3:22 As a single guy, I've been principally focused on my investments and my health and wellbeing, and growing on a personal level. I can really focus on what's best for me in a way that I couldn't when I was in a relationship, in a way that I can't when I get into a relationship again. Because when you're in a relationship, you also have to consider what's best for another person.
3:43 Being single has really given me the time to focus on my own interests. When I was working in the corporate world, I had to focus on what my boss wanted, what my company wanted. And when I was in relationships, I had to focus on what my girlfriend wanted. And now, as a single guy, I can focus on what I want and I can pursue personal growth.
4:01 I can make time to go exercise. I can make time to eat healthy. I can make time to explore and go to see and do the things that I'm curious about. Personal growth can take many different forms. I think a lot of you will find this to be the benefit of being a single guy or a bachelor expat because you get to dictate how that personal growth plays out.
4:24 If you have a weight loss goal, you realize, 'Okay, I need to reduce my sugar intake,' or 'I need to cut out certain types of fats or oils.' I don't know what that journey looks like for you, but if you're an expat bachelor, you can dictate that plan. You can really determine what personal growth looks like for you.
4:43 You could set the goals, right? You could say, 'You know what? This is what personal growth looks like for me.' As an example, I want to learn to be happy alone. Well, what does happiness look like, and how do I know when I've attained it?
4:57 The next point here is privacy. If you are in a relationship, or if you've ever been in a relationship, you know that privacy can go out the window. That your girlfriend will ask you, 'Why didn't you shave? Why don't you wear this? Why don't you wear that? You need to do this. You need to do that.' You're not going to have the same level of privacy in a relationship that you do as a single guy.
5:15 Even as a single guy, I get recognized when I go out in public, not just from the YouTube channel, but also through women who are in the social circle of a woman I'm chatting with, like her friends or family or acquaintances. You might get recognized in public by her friends or her cousin. She's probably going to tell them, 'Hey, this is the guy I'm talking to. This is the guy I'm interested in.'
5:39 I've had that experience here in Dumaguete where I've been chatting with a woman in another city, and she reached out to me saying, 'Oh, hey, my cousin saw you. Hey, my sister saw you.' So if you're totally the bachelor, you're not even chatting with women, then expect to have more privacy. Where for a lot of us, when we start to chat and talk to different women, our privacy is going out the window.
5:59 You have the coconut security cameras, let's say, across the islands, just observing you and seeing what you're doing. If you are dating other women, if you invite other women out or over to your place, that kind of thing, people will see this. People will pick up on this. You'd be surprised who is paying attention.
6:21 I also find Filipinos in general to have very good eyesight, much better than myself. They can see much more clearly for longer distances and with much sharper vision than myself. That's something to be aware of that you want the privacy to get up, go where you want, do as you please. You'll have to give some of that up if you want to move on from a bachelor lifestyle.
6:44 And conversely, I think this is one of those advantages of being a bachelor and moving around a lot. Is if you move around a lot, you may not have the same opportunity to get into a relationship. If your plan is to travel to the Philippines and you're moving from location to location every month, every few weeks, can you really start a relationship?
7:05 You'd have to clarify with that person, 'Hey, are you open to moving around with me?' or 'Do you need to be in this location? Is it really important for you to be in this location, or can you come with me?' So the next point, point number four, is cultural immersion. And for me, being a bachelor, being a single guy, I'm much more likely to be invited to different events.
7:25 I've been invited to fiestas here in Newag. And if I had a girlfriend, I don't know that I'd be as likely to be invited by female friends. I don't know that that would be as socially acceptable or socially appropriate. I think that it'd be more likely that there would be some kind of issue or challenge there. We'd have to be mindful of that.
7:48 Additionally, if you want to attend different events and you need to bring your partner with you, you're going as a couple. You're not really going as an individual. You may not have the ability to integrate to the same degree because you're having to integrate as a couple. Maybe you need to go to her family events as opposed to the events of your friends.
8:07 I've spoken to different Filipinos about this, and typically it would not be acceptable for their boyfriend or husband to go and hang out with other single Filipinos. And it just wouldn't be culturally appropriate. So if you are a single guy, you don't have that constraint like you would in a relationship.
8:24 Point number five, and this probably factors into every reason in this video, is flexibility. As far as flexibility goes, if I wanted to go over there to Siquijor Island, I wouldn't have to think about it. I'd just walk over to the ferry terminal and buy a ticket. I'd be in Siquijor in like an hour or so, depending on which ferry I took.
8:40 I wouldn't have to go and ask, 'Hey, do you mind if I go over to Siquijor? Hey, do you have time to go over to Siquijor? What time do you need to be back tomorrow?' These questions just don't play into the equation. So you have this flexibility of, 'Oh, I could just go over there with very little thought.' And then, 'Oh, you know what? I like Siquijor. I think I'll stay for a week.' You can do that. That's not a problem.
9:00 Where if you're in a relationship, you've got to consider, 'Hey, do you have time to go to Siquijor? Do you want to go to Siquijor? Would you prefer to go to Apo Island?' You have to consider a lot of other things, and then you have to think about their scheduling.
9:12 The next point is self-care. And if you're in a relationship, you've got to prioritize not just yourself, but the other person. But if you're a bachelor, you can look after your own well-being. If you want to go work out, you can work out whenever you want. You want to have a specialized diet? I think it's easier to have a specialized diet as a single guy.
9:33 Whatever you want to do to take care of yourself is easier to pull off as a single person. If you want to just chill...
9:39 As a single person, if you want to just chill at home one day, relax, not go out, not feel pressured that you need to go here or there, then you can do that. As a single guy, if you didn't sleep well the night before, nobody's going to be asking you the next day, 'Hey, can we go to the grocery store? Hey, can we go here? Hey, can we go there? We have this thing at my parents' house.' None of those things apply. You could just chill at home, get all the rest you want, you could sleep in. I slept in today, it was pretty nice. Nobody had a problem with that.
10:04 If you're in a relationship, you have to prioritize the care of another person. You have to look after them, you have to make sure they have what they need. If you're single, you don't have to worry about that, so it's a real trade-off.
10:16 The next point is budgeting control. If you are a single person, all you have to worry about is your own needs. You have to worry about your rent, your electric, your food, your transportation. If you decide you want to have a cheap month, then you can do it. You can cut your expenses that month, you can go out less, you can go to the bar less, you can just chill at home, you can find free activities to do like going to the beach. You don't have to spend a lot.
10:47 Whereas if you're in a relationship, you've got to pay for two meals, you've got to buy extra groceries, you have to handle certain expenses. You got to go to the doctor for them, you got to take them to the doctor, you got to pay for certain things. But if you're a single guy, you just don't have those expenses.
11:01 Now, some guys have said it evens out that they spend a lot on dating, but for me personally, as a single guy, I'm fine with a smaller studio apartment. I'm fine with okay restaurants. I'm fine with not shopping a whole lot. These things could change with a partner, depends on your partner, right? Some potential partners have higher expectations, some have lower expectations, but typically there's going to be some amount of expectation for you to shoulder certain expenses in the relationship.
11:30 As a single guy, for example, I like to walk. I'm fine with walking long distances; I think it's good for my health. The big ones for me would be accommodation. I think if you have a relationship, you need a little bit bigger apartment. And food, if you're feeding two people, it's going to cost you more than it costs to feed one person. You can mitigate this to some extent by cooking more at home, but if you ever want to go out to eat, you're going to be paying for two meals as opposed to one meal. That's worth consideration if you're just a single guy.
12:02 When you think about the value of your time to just go out to eat, unless you're a chef, I have some friends, one comes to mind that's probably watching this video, and he worked as a chef for a long time, so he can make fantastic meals in line with his desires that are really great quality for a modest price point. But for those of us who don't have that experience or training, we may be better served by just going to restaurants. I personally don't cook at home, but I do think that could be a way to save money.
12:33 The next point is you avoid the challenges of a relationship. We hear the term sometimes 'drama' in relation to miscommunications or disagreements between expats, but I think it can also apply to relationship drama. I mean, you have a disagreement with your partner, you think you might want to break up, whatever it may be, even minor disagreements over very mundane topics. Cultural differences can lead to disagreements that, as a single guy, you don't have to worry about.
13:05 Right now, I'm single, I don't have to worry about disagreements with a partner. I don't have to worry about cultural sensitivity to the same extent that I would if I were in a relationship. There's just not as much for me to bump into or run into.
13:16 As a single guy, I spend more of my time alone than I would if I were in a committed relationship, and it's quite peaceful. There's no, 'Hey, did you leave the toilet seat up?' There's none of the challenges that come with having to consider another person and the friction that it can cause. It is a trade-off. I'm not here to tell people that, 'Oh, you should be single and being single is the only way to go about things,' but there's some benefits to being single.
13:41 The next point here is socializing. Some would assume that your social life will improve if you're in a relationship, but I actually think it's the opposite for a lot of guys. If you're single, you can tag yourself onto different group outings a lot more easily. You could just jump into plans more easily. If people have one extra spot in their car going somewhere, it's a lot easier than if you're a couple trying to tag on to that same outing.
14:07 I've also found that for other bachelors or other single people, it's easier to tag on as a single person. I spend more of my time with my other friends that are single than I do with friends in relationships, just because naturally we end up going to the same places. We end up living in certain neighborhoods that cater more to bachelors or to single people, whereas other areas cater more to couples. You'll hear this a lot that downtown Dumag is more of a place for single guys, whereas an area like Valencia is catering more toward couples or people in relationships, married people. And that probably goes for just about every city you could think of that certain areas are more for single people, other areas more for those in relationships.
14:50 Additionally, if I want to go out as a single guy, the only person that needs to make that decision is me. Whereas if I'm in a relationship and my significant other doesn't want to go out, you may feel bad, depending on your relationship, that you're leaving them behind. I know of some guys who are in relationships where they're not allowed to go out alone. Make of that what you will. I wouldn't be comfortable in a relationship like that. Some guys find themselves in codependency and not being allowed to go out on their own, not being allowed to have that independence.
15:18 I find that most of my friends are not in that situation, but that goes for any country. I have friends growing up that they grew up in toxic families and they didn't learn how to function as an individual within the context of a relationship, and they were joined at the hip with their significant other. There was no room for them to go out and meet up with friends, have fun. I'm not saying going out to the bar, but even just like going out exploring, maybe taking a trip together, something like that.
15:51 I mean, maybe some people are happy with that. I personally would not. I like some degree of independence. I like some amount of time spent with friends or alone. Each person has to find the balance that works best for them, but I know as a single guy, there's none of those concerns.
16:07 The final point, point number 10, is that you have the freedom to reinvent yourself. If you are in the context of a relationship, then you might fall into old patterns of behavior. I know some of us are triggered by past relationship baggage. As a single guy, you have the power to reinvent yourself, and you get to make the decisions about how you want to reinvent yourself. If you want to lose weight, if you want to join a gym, if you want to take an online class, however you want to reinvent yourself, if you want to become more outgoing. Conversely, if you want to spend more time alone, some guys will go to countries or cultures where the people are more introverted. Other guys would prefer to be in a more introverted culture and spend more time alone. There's nothing wrong with that.
16:50 There are many different benefits in terms of reinventing yourself that being a single expat can provide. This list is just scratching the surface. You could pursue all kinds of different activities where if you're in a relationship, you got to consider what they want to do. If they don't want to scuba dive, then you may not be doing quite as much scuba diving as you'd prefer.
17:12 So let me know what you think down in the comments below. Are you planning to be an expat bachelor? Are you planning to be in a relationship? If you want to be an expat bachelor, what are the benefits that you foresee? Have you sworn off relationships? Are you committed to the bachelor life? It always helps to generate interesting discussion questions in the comment section when we share our thoughts and ideas. Next, give us a thumbs up, it helps with the YouTube algorithm. And finally, subscribe to the channel down below if you want to see more content like this, and we'll see you soon.
Follow the journey through expat life, travel experiences, and the realities of living abroad while exploring different places, cultures, and everyday life overseas.
