hey YouTube Alex here I was inspired to make this video cuz a friend of mine told me why don't you do a video where you talk about how to get on somebody's personal Blacklist here in the Philippines some
people that come here they're unhappy with their lives they may have a personality issue there could be many different reasons as to why somebody ends up on a personal Blacklist of course this is different than the black list
that a lot of people think about being barred from entry right we're not about that instead we're talking about how do you get on people's bad lists where you're excluded from the group or excluded from certain groups Gatherings
of people and most of my subscribers or what I'd call good guy expats or good gal xats so reason number one is that you don't like the people it sounds bizarre to say but some people don't get along
with the local people here they don't like the culture for whatever reason they find the more laid-back nature here the relaxed pace imperfections or challenges here to be so problematic rather than taking responsibility and maybe going somewhere else
going back to their home country going to another country entirely they are Lu a stick in the mud and they act like they're stuck here like there's nowhere else to go and it's the fault of the people that
they can't leave really they should look at their own lives and assess why is it that I ended up in a place that I didn't want to be rather than preparing for the future and doing more research to
figure out a place that better suits them it's it's not the fault of the Filipino people that you're here if you're not a citizen if you're not a Filipino person then you're here based on the Goodwill of the
people some people operate on the premise that they are a paying customer they're not a paying customer they are a visitor many of us here are on tourist visas some may be on srvs or 13A visas some people
are not happy here they take it out on the people here and it's really unfortunate because I found that a lot of the people here just want you to have a good time here they want you enjoy their
beautiful country see the beautiful islands to explore the interesting Urban Landscapes some people are just unhappy wherever they go and they're going to take out that frustration on people in the service industry drivers waitresses or waiters cell phone
service providers all these people who they're just trying to do their best they're just trying to be productive they're just trying to make their bosses happy they shouldn't be the target of your frustration it's unfortunate that some people
that don't like it here feel stuck by economic circumstances but it's certainly not the fault of the people here that your economic situation is not what you wanted it to be I'm not saying that that's the only reason
to come here I love this country it's gorgeous in my opinion it's the most beautiful country in the world some foreigners the only reason they come here is financial others only come for the dating and I find that
for those two reasons if that's a primary reason or the only reason somebody comes here they're more likely to be un happy and by extension mistreat the people here so if you mistreat Filipino people if you don't like
Filipino people you're going to find yourself on some black lists you're going to be excluded from a lot of groups who they actually get along with the people here they look at it as a wonderful place to be
and to spend time they've got a lot of Filipino friends partner girlfriend wife husband they don't want to see the people being mistreated sometimes they think they should be a required cultural sensitivity training class for foreigners wishing to
live here and they could learn better about how to get along with the Filipino people this is something that a number of the groups Sim in they will exclude you if you are inconsiderate or you don't like Filipino
people most of my friends here have Filipino friends most of my friends here have Filipino girlfriends or wives maybe sister-in-laws nieces nephews brother-in-laws father-in-law's some foreigners do tend to have a main character syndrome going on where they think
this is their place the people are here to entertain them to serve them and that's not the case and if you find yourself on the outs with any group you're probably not going to find your way back in
some guys that are Bad actors take this as a sign I need to move Islands word travels fast people know each other especially in the vlogging Community they talk with one another oh man this guy was really inconsiderate
to Philipino person who's really disrespectful watch out for him and you could find yourself excluded from groups that you've never even met before now I'll never tell you I'm the perfect Foreigner sometimes I do get stressed out here
I don't take it out on the people ultim timately it's not their fault one of the challenges that I have here is that there is at times inclement weather is that the fault of the people absolutely not they
don't control the weather here you can see in the background the clouds are rolling in okay I might get rained on is that the fault of a person who lives here absolutely not taking these frustrations out on people
is just so unreasonable to prevent being on the out group I recommend studying the culture trying to understand the culture trying to meet people halfway trying to think about where they're coming from there are foreigners that once get
on enough personal blacklists they will find life here to be so isolating they will ideally leave this is something that people who want to live here should be aware of is that especially in a city like dag Getti
with tons of expats we all talk we all communicate we all know each other or we know people that know each other or we have mutual friends and if you get spotted being rude to somebody and it's on
video that video will circulate like crazy it's bad enough that you did it in the first place but to add insult to injury you have belittled or insulted a Filipino person and it's on camera such that that video
will get circulated around which is additional embarrassment for that person there is a culture of Saving Face throughout Asia people care about their public reputation you can't go around slandering people you can't go around treating people badly it's
even more the case if they're a business person maybe they're a prominent businessman maybe they're highly regarded in the community and even if they're not people don't like to see you mistreat Filipinos this goes throughout the country I've
definitely gotten the from some foreigners oh can you believe this or can you believe that and I'm thinking why are you here if it really bothers you that much there's so many other places to go in the world
there's a lot to love about this country there's a lot to love about the people some of these guys that are Bad actors they think I'm going to impress this Foreigner by being disrespectful or inconsiderate or making a
Sly or sarcastic remark because that Foreigner doesn't immediately blow up or make a big deal out of it you think oh they don't care or maybe they agree with me that's not the case people here are generally non-confrontational
and I find a lot of the foreigners that last here succeed here adopt a non-confrontational nature about them they may not say something to you directly they may not engage and argue back or this and that but they're
probably going to go around telling people they know hey this guy watch out for him he's bad news don't hang out with him he doesn't like the people here he thinks he is superior and he thinks that he
is extraordinary like he is playing some kind of status game where he thinks that he's in charge and that's not the case it's not the case at all I don't want to associate with such people I don't want
to be around such people I don't want to be seen with such people but most importantly I don't want to hear that stuff okay the people here have been very good to me I enjoy being here a lot
and I don't want to be known as somebody who entertains these kinds of conversations I think they're unproductive I think they're unfair I think they're unreasonable they don't have a place here finally the local people are the reason
you enjoy a high standard of living here the people who work in the restaurants who work in the hotels who work in the tourism industry the fact that you can come here and enjoy a beautiful tropical country on
what amounts to a budget friendly trip for most people coming from the US or UK is a testament to the hard work of the people here who are often working long hours to make it happen so have to
put yourself in their shoes could you imagine what it would be like if people of extraordinary means came to your country and started mistreating your people I found the people here to be generally very helpful they don't ask
for much in return just be polite be friendly pay your bills and fold if you're a person who's just not friendly you're probably not going to be happy here the next way that you can get on a personal
Blacklist is by admitting criminal activity now I am not a mind reader I can't figure out if what you're saying is true what you're saying is not true but if an expat admits to me that they have committed
a crime I don't care how small the crime is I don't care how big the crime is that's a quick way to get on my personal Blacklist I do not associate with criminals of any kind here in the
Philippines I'm not looking to change that I don't want to be around him I don't want to be known as somebody who hangs out with criminals there are many laws here that have to be followed there are a
number of laws here that stick out to me that are not rules back home but that we have to follow here I'm not going to go through those if you're somebody that you're unsure about a certain law or
rule I suggest reaching out to a licensed Philippines attorney who can guide you through understanding those laws you might ask them what are the most commonly broken laws by foreigners what are the medium broken laws by foreigners and
they one of the less common laws that foreigners break here you can get a sense of what is is and is not allowed there's certain activities you're not sure about you can run them by the licensed attorney and
ask them hey I want to do this or hey I want to do that is it something where I need to get a license is it something where I need to get a Visa you really want to know
in advance and be proactive about what your plans are to make sure even things that you think oh no it's totally fine I'm just doing the right thing not even something that's like obviously bad that still may not
be allowed and so if I find out somebody is engaging in any type of rule breaking I immediately distance myself from them I don't invite them to my Social Circle I don't make plans with them I don't want
to be known as endorsing that activity I don't want to be seen as endorsing that activity I want to keep coming back to the Philippines for years and years and years I don't want anything to interrupt that I
me this is a beautiful country and there's so much to see and do here and I don't want my plans to be interrupted I have had an expat or expats admit to me hey yeah I just committed this
crime casually and they go around telling different expats or different guys about it and we're just shaking our heads like not only did you do something that's against the rules but now you're bragging about it unfortunately some people
who engage in this kind of behavior are also proud of it it doesn't make any sense to me but these people quickly find their way onto the personal Blacklist where they're not welcome to hang out with people they're
not welcome to join these social groups we don't want to be around them we don't want to be known as endorsing or entertaining that kind of behavior most of us want to stay here for a long time and
we don't want to be known as a guy who doesn't know know how to follow the rules we're here based on the Good Will of the people and to maintain the Good Will of the people we want to
follow the rules we want to follow the laws some people just don't know how to behave we're not talking about jaywalking here we're talking about real problematic behavior that you don't want to be associated with you'd be disgusted
by in your home country but even more so here halfway around the world where you're not a Filipino person and this isn't your home country it's a privilege to be here you don't have a right to be here
it's really unfortunate that some people abuse that privilege I don't want to be around him none of my friends want to be around him you'll quickly be excluded from our group if you are a person who wants to
engage in this kind of behavior for all the reasons listed above I also look at it like if somebody is willing to commit a basic crime they may want to escalate and do more serious things in the future
I don't want to be around that I don't want to potentially support that we don't want to associate with somebody who get sent back home and if they do get sent back home they may struggle to ever come
back to even visit I don't want to invest in relationships with people that are short-term thinkers that oh the rules don't apply to me this and that that's not the case and I'm a person that likes to follow
the rules all my friends are as well if you want to filter out the bad guys you're an expat or would be expat that's concerned about some of the people you might run into one of the ways that
you can filter out is if somebody admits to you that they are breaking a rule distance yourself you don't have to be ugly you don't have to get upset with them just distance yourself some of these people are
a bit unhinged and not all the way there if you know what I mean you can still distance yourself you don't have to hang out with them you make plans with other people you don't include them you don't
let them know where you live you don't let them know what you like to do for fun or where you like to spend your time you can just distance yourself from this type of person without making a big
deal out of it because who knows what might happen with this type of person finally you do see some guys that do get sent back home it's unlikely that they're ever going to be able to come back even
for a visit a lot of us we don't want to get sent back home we don't want to not be able to visit these beautiful islands and interact with these friendly people it's best to set those boundaries and
protect yourself nobody is looking out for you like you are anywhere in the world don't feel like you're being high and mighty I find it's better to find reasons to disqualify people from my friend group than to try
to find reasons to be more inclusive when it comes to other expats plenty of awesome locals the expats can be an odd Bunch it's very important for foreigners to follow the rules while they are here and part of
what will allow me to do that is to have a good track record when it comes to R breaking I've met foreigners that just not too long after I met them told me about breaking the rules there are
some very obvious ones if you're unfamiliar I suggest checking out Mike of Mike's Philippine retirement his channel covers some of this stuff very well the next part of the liar component is the issue of Stolen Valor now I
personally have not encountered this but I have heard other friends encounter this where somebody will misrepresent their military service they may have not even been in the military at all or they exaggerate they had a standard rank but
they're telling people they were a Navy SEAL they may change the branch entirely they may change the duration of service maybe they were in for 4 years they say they were in for 10 or 20 they misrepresent where
they served maybe they served domestically but they portray themselves as having served all over the world maybe they didn't see combat but they described themselves as a seasoned combat veteran there's all kinds of different ways somebody could misrepresent
their service it bothers me because my grandfather served for about 20 years in Korea Vietnam and he made a lot of sacrifices and our family made a lot of sacrifices and it's really harmful to military members when people
misrepresent their service and this one if I find out if I were to find out somebody had misrepresented their service it would be a immediate qualification for for my personal Blacklist I would not want to be around this
individual think that Stolen Valor is extremely harmful detrimental to our service members and I can't stand for it I don't want to be known as somebody who endorses that who is friends with people like that I would tell
all my friends especially my friends who have served in the military who are veterans hey this person is misrepresenting their service now I personally haven't served but there are certain things that are kind of telltale signs where typically
they exaggerate a lot the accomplishments they describe are extraordinarily rare very very rare they might even disclose things that a person in that situation might not be legally allowed to disclose depending on circumstances it's not foolproof I'm not
sitting here saying I know immediately when somebody is doing this if I were to find out about this it would be a immediate personal blacklisting for me military members make a lot of dramatic sacrifices in terms of time
personal freedom Health sometimes more than that and we should be very cognizant of those who wish to harm that reputation harm the respect associated with our military and yeah I mean many Filipinos have made sacrifices in the US
military it can be harmful to Filipino people as well some people will misrepresent their criminal background they say oh yeah I've just had a little thing here a little thing there and then it comes out they've got a
lengthy rap sheet there are people living abroad who do have a criminal background who are using expat life as an escape to get away from from accountability where in their town or their city they're known as deceptive or
as a person with a bad reputation and so they think well if I just go to this other country nobody will know about that stuff maybe they use a fake name I wouldn't be surprised if some of these
people use a fake name I've had people be very very guarded this kind of falls into this category where if somebody's too guarded it raises red flags for me if they won't talk about very basic details they're always
I can't tell you that I can't tell you this then that's a red flag for me because if they're not able to disclose very basic information I'm not asking for people's addresses I'm not asking for people to tell
me every single detail of their life but the majority of people that I've met here they're fairly open they're fairly open about their lives in a normal way and I respect people's privacy I don't pry I don't push
people to disclose painful things but if we're talking about very very basic information then it does raise red flags to me it's not something I immediately put them on a black list but now I'm kind of looking like
is there something here that I need to be aware of and in a small town like daget everybody knows each other inevitably things will come out it's not easy to hide a criminal background especially if you've done particularly
egregious activities people are going to find out it's going to get around town people are going to know and they're not going to want to associate with that type of person a lot of expats here have a lot
of time on their hands so if you're a person that's got a bad record you may be stuck keeping to yourself because you may be unwelcome when people find out about it and you have to be prepared for
that as far as I know none of my good friends here have any issues like that but don't be surprised if you meet people with a past here they are at least as common as you'd think I say
this a lot most people do not become expats because things were working out for them back home different from the expat who moves over sees for a work contract somebody's moving for other reasons typically they've got some things
in their past that I have some tragedy in my past that I tried to put behind me by moving halfway around the world but we all have our own reasons some of them are not good the next reason
that we have for you here is that the expad is too argumentative and this is a personality issue people range on a scale from disagreeable to agreeable and the most disagreeable people tend to be those who are behind
bars and the most agreeable people tend to be extraordinary pushovers most of us tend to be somewhere in the middle like somewhere in the mid-range some expats are so argumentative so disagreeable that they do end up on personal
Blacklist I can think of some that I've met they always want to debate American politics oh let's talk about politics let's talk about religion I don't want to talk about these topics with the majority of people you're not
going to win these type of discussions these Zero Sum discussions where there's a winner and a loser I don't care to engage in these conversations do I have my personal beliefs sure I think we all do they're just
not of interest to me but some guys they know these are contentious topics they know that they are likely to rile people up to stress people out and they love it talking to some of these guys is like
wrestling with a pig in the mud you think you're winning Until you realize the pig likes it there are a lot of argumentative disagreeable expats out there I use the politics of the religion example but yeah I mean
I have definitely encountered some expats that they want to debate religious topics I'm not interested in that that and none of my friends are either if I find somebody that always wants to debate religious topics they're going to
end up on my personal Black List I'm not opposed to people having faith I have a lot of friends that have different religious backgrounds I'm friends with people of many different Faith probably most the major ones you could
think of and then I also have friends with no faith at all and everything in between I'm not interested in the guy that wants to we're going to talk about faith today no no I don't want to debate
there I'm not interested in debates in relation to this topic I'm often saying if I wanted to argue with Americans I would just go back home to the United States back in the United States there are plenty of
Americans that would debate me on these topics all day long they would like for nothing more than to discuss I didn't come here to the Philippines to argue and if I meet somebody that all they want to do
is argue or to debate they're on my personal Black List I don't care to argue if I wanted to argue I would go to law school and I would get paid to argue in a few years I would
be hired by people solely to argue am I good at it I admit that I am I don't care to do it it's stressful it's annoying I get a headache I don't want to participate in that activity and
none of my friends do either a lot of the guys that I'm friends with here they came here to retire they worked a stressful job back home they had a business they dealt with Investments they're not here to
debate and to argue and to win they're here to relax they're here to have a good time they might be here to engage an adventure they might come here for dating they might come here for finan cial reasons
they didn't come here to fight with other people they didn't come here to oh I'm going to teach this guy this and that no no no and fortunately not everybody here is like this but there's a non-zero amount
of expats that they love to debate they love to attempt to start arguments to win arguments it's not personal they pick the arguments with anybody and everybody they go out looking for a debate they go out looking for
an argument I think they've got some interpersonal issues I think these guys tend to not pick up on social cues very well and they tend to be very isolated I've noticed some guys like this where they run everybody
off and they're always trying to meet a new friend they're always trying to meet somebody new they can't maintain relationships with other expats because they inevitably end up running them off they turn everything into debate and most people
just don't have the energy for that so when I meet somebody like this I'm not telling you what to do I stir clear them I'm polite you don't know what's going on upstairs I'm certainly not obligated to entertain
these conversations these arguments I wish them the best this is a type of xath that will quickly end up on my personal Blacklist the next point is the complainer okay so for me I consider it a blessing to
be here in the Philippines there's a lot of interesting experiences I've had here that are very positive I try to generally keep it positive I'm happy to be here if I wasn't happy to be here I could fly
to Manila right over there and I could fly back to my home country I could fly to some other country in Southeast Asia I try not to complain do I have stressful days sometimes yes I'm not perfect some
people are incessant complainers from the moment they land here oh it's too hot and my hamburger isn't the way that I had it back home and they have this endless list of complaints they have this endless list of
frustrations they're never satisfied there are some people that go out looking for problems for my friends this type of person will quickly get on a personal Blacklist all the guys here not most but all the guys here I'm
friends with they enjoy it here they like the people they like the culture they like the opport opportunity to have different activities they like dating here they've got many different reasons to enjoy their time here in the Philippines
and they try to minimize complaining are there times where we have difficult circumstances sure anywhere you live in the world you're going to have your stressful days but for the most part we try to avoid complaining we try
to keep it positive upbeat uplifting there might be some challenging times and we can get together and help pick each other back up but for the most part it's awesome to be here I mean I really like it
here my social life is fantastic secure I could say many many more good things about the Philippines than negatives but some people they just don't like it I don't know if it's they didn't do enough research I don't
know if it's an adaptability thing I don't know if it's they're not happy with their budget I don't know if it's they feel priced out of their home country for any different number of reasons some people are not
happy here and they can't just keep it to themselves like that's a different set of issues but some people they want to externalize it oh hey man can you believe that this and I just don't like that and
those types of people quickly get excluded from the group because chances are they're not going to stop they're not going to ever stop running out of issues they're not going to stop running out of complaints or frustrations things
they don't like and it's not enough to solve these issues and if you don't like it you can go home for all of us that are foreigners here we've got a home country we've got a place we can
go back to where we speak the language where we know how things operate we may not like it but at least we belong there so yeah for complainers my group has no sympathy for this type of people we
don't want to be around them a lot of it is just having flexibility if you don't like a specific City you might try a different city not every city or location in the Philippines is for everybody some people
like a certain way of doing things and a certain city they go to is not for them and that's okay but to stick around and to belabor the point to go on and on about how it's not this
and it's not that and this isn't right and that's not right you're really going to wear people's good graces down and it's going to get around that you complain and that you don't like it and people are not
going to include you they're not going to welcome you into their group they might change locations and you don't get the detail and you're off on your own unfortunately like I said before earlier in the video some people
some expats do not pick up on social cues they don't know how to communicate with others they didn't get the training maybe they weren't socialized properly at a young enough age where they learned how to talk to people
they don't understand most people don't like complainers most people don't like arguers yeah they just need to find a different place they need to figure out a different current fit for them so anyway this has been five reasons
as to how you can end up on a personal Black List this is not the official Black List this is more about navigating group dynamics and how some people just don't fit in and some of the reasons why
a person might get excluded from a group if you have any reasons as to why somebody might be excluded from your group let us know down in the comments below are there any pet peeves that you have additionally
give us a thumbs up it really helps with the YouTube algorithm and finally subscribe to the channel down below if you want to see more content like this and we'll see you soon bye-bye
